The most recent edition of Parents magazine ran an article called "39 Things Every Mom Should Know." Now, I have only been a mom for the past 5 years, but some of the items on the list made me chuckle. I will share my favorite "Top Ten" from the list.
1. Don't make birthday parties a big deal. I totally agree! I have seen parents go completely overboard when it comes to their child's birthday parties, throwing them elaborate, celebrity children style birthday bashes! No kidding! I always think, wow, if the child is getting all of that when they are turning just 5 years-old, what will they expect when they are 16? Dave and I have talked about keeping birthday parties pretty simple around here. I love to desposit money into one of their accounts for the future, and I really do not want to raise spoiled brats!
I lived with a family for a year and a half while I was a beginning teacher, and I have to say that they were really the model family. I loved how they just got to the heart of the matter with everything they did. When it was a child's birthday, the rest of the children (there were 6 children in the family) made homemade cards and a banner for the birthday boy/girl.
The child was told they could choose a place to eat out (a favorite restaurant), or he/she could have his/her mom prepare his/her favorite home-cooked meal (and a cake). 99% of the time, the child chose the meal at home made by his/her mom. They really made each birthday day special for each child and spent quality time with that child on his/her birthday. I just loved that. We have taken the same approach with Reilly these past couple of years.
2. Just throw away the poopy underwear. Ha, ha! How many of you moms have done just that or something similar? It has been rare, but Addie has peed her pants while we have been out and about, and I have thrown out her underwear! Lately, I have been packing an extra outfit complete with clean "undies" for her when we go away for the day...just in case. They have lots of underwear; we can spare a pair here or there!
3. Don't beat yourself up if you have to use a bribe. Are you kidding me? I use bribes all of the time, especially while taking photos of them! How do you think I get any photos of them? Works like a charm these days...
4. Buy cheap shoes when kids are little. Feet grow faster than you think. I don't think I've ever spent more than $15 for a pair of children's shoes...not yet, anyway. It is true. Their little feet grow very quickly. Addie has really big feet. She wears a size 10 in toddler shoes, while Reilly is still wearing a size 12 in toddler shoes. They will get nicer shoes when they don't grow as much in a given year...and also when they officially start playing sports!
5. Know this: That stain won't come out. And it's okay. (The sooner you accept this, the better). Okay, so this one is really hard for me. I hate how anytime I buy the girls a new outfit, it seems to get stained after one wearing. Drives.me.nuts! At least now, with photography, I know I can Photoshop it out of a photo. That makes me feel a little bit better.
6. Don't administer a punishment that hurts you more than it does them. Every parent learns this one pretty quickly, I think. For example, grounding Reilly from Grandma's house means we don't get a break! We learned that one...
7. Always pack wipes. If your kids go somewhere without you, send along wipes. It's like having a mom with them. You'd think I would have learned by now. Why do I still forget the wipes? They should be in my purse...right now, but they are not. I always forget the wipes, and I always need them! Dave remembers them. I need to work on this one. Heck, even the adults need wipes from time to time! I must pack the wipes!
8. Dress your little girls like, well, little girls. I think I'm pretty good at this one! Dave, on the other hand... He needs a little help! I love to shop for little girl clothing. I have been really good in the past year or so about cutting back on cute little girl clothing, but I love, love, LOVE cute clothes for little girls! And now I will have a new little girl to dress...
9. If the school year, new babysitter, or karate class gets off to a rocky start, don't totally stress out about it. Instead, think of the improvement that can be made by the end of the year. As a former athlete, I admit I kind-of stressed about Reilly when she was in gymnastics. It just didn't come naturally to her. I love sports, and I wanted her to do well at them! I did observe improvement in her skills, however, by the end of that year.
For Addie, gymnastics has come much more naturally! She is doing a great job and really stands out in her class. When she participated in art class this summer, however, with Reilly, it was interesting to see the difference in the two girls. Addie scribbled and made messes; Reilly drew and painted detailed, creative pictures/projects. Also concerning to me as the parent was that Addie insisted that all of her work be black! She just could not get enough black in her art work! Black is what attracted her when it came to art. Funny how two kids can be so different. Addie did improve a little bit during the 6 weeks of art class. I love to watch my kids grow!
10. Independence is a wonderful thing. For everyone. So is together time. Make sure you have a healthy dose of both. I agree. We still need to strike a balance here. We are with our kids (at least one of us is with them) 24/7. We rarely get a break. I believe everybody needs a break! We have tried our hardest the past two summers to find somebody to watch them once a week so we could work on our house and own personal interests. Why this is so difficult, I have no idea, but we have not had a real break all summer. It is time for a big date night once this baby is born! I haven't felt like going out to eat in a restaurant this summer due to being pregnant, but shortly after the baby is born, we are going out for sushi and a night alone!